Will We Ever Stop Judging?

Have you ever looked at parents with troubled children going astray and thought, “I wonder what they did or didn't do?” Or, “What kind of parents would let that happen? What made their kid turn out like that?” Or here's the big one: “That wouldn’t have happened if that was my child.”

Once upon a time I thought that way, but that was a long, long time ago–practically another lifetime. I’ve had the experience of being on the other side–the parent being judged–and I came to understand long ago that you don't judge someone or a situation you know nothing about. I learned this the hard way, and I have the scars to prove it. Some of those scars have healed, and some are still open because of ongoing lessons.

Most of the time I don’t think we mean to judge, it just happens. Satan is great at pricking our pride a little in certain situations–situations that produce in us a cause to compare to others, and giving him that room to wiggle into our thoughts is not a good thing. But he’s never satisfied until he’s taken over. I once read this on a Baptist church sign back in North Carolina: “Give Satan an inch, he’ll be a ruler.” And that’s exactly what happens when we give him that wiggle room into our thoughts.

We have eight children, and many times in the past, my husband and I were judged by people who thought we have too many. Many people in the world are still of a socialist mentality and have been propagandized to believe it is because of people like us that the world is “overpopulated.” We are the reason the earth's resources are depleting. Have you ever heard anything so idiotic? The only resources I have ever seen depleting are the groceries in our fridge and pantry.

On the flipside, some couples are unable to have any children, yet they are judged by people who have no idea of the painful struggles the couple has gone through because of wanting a child so badly. They are automatically judged as selfish.

We don't know what goes on in the homes of others. We don't know what others are dealing with in their lives. We also don't know what others are dealing with emotionally. We don't know any of these things . . . but God knows.

And suppose we really do know? Suppose we have even witnessed some choices of others. It is still not our place to judge. Judge between right and wrong, yes, but judging others? No. And the thing is, if we truly know who we are, we won't feel a need to be judgmental. When you truly know who you are, you feel sorrow and empathy for others, yet steer clear of judgmental thoughts.

I’ll get this perfected one day. Until then, I will continue to repent every time a judgmental thought rears its ugly head and tries to intrude–which is basically repentance every five minutes, folks :-)

That makes me extra grateful for the atonement.